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January 2016
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January 2017

Three Pears To Help Slay The Dragon

So here I am... dealing with my demons, trying to paint. It is tough when you are just learning how to paint, when you have been away from your paints for a long time, or even when you paint every day, therefore you face a blank surface often.

Painting, or rather, getting better at painting is tough stuff and not for the faint at heart.

When I want to paint, here is what I do:

I start by procrastinating. I clean the house, start laundry, eat something, anything to avoid facing the drama of it all. It is the impending disappointment that is oh so reliable. I know it is coming. I think of it as a dragon. This dragon rears it's ugly head from behind me. It breaths fire onto my art surface before it is ready to be judged. I can sense the snickering going on as I begin to paint..."she thinks THAT is the right color to start with?"..." she really should have learned to draw as a child," and it goes on like that from there.

In an effort to keep the dragon quiet yesterday, I chose to work with pears. I find that working with a subject I know really well already, helps tame that silly dragon. Because pears are organic shapes, painting them, vs. a hard edged object, like a building, allows me a little more wiggle room. By painting pears, then, I can attempt to slay the dragon.

I start with a pencil sketch. This forces me to spend time looking at my subject. By not jumping right into paints, I get myself "in the zone" and am more able to detect the nuances of what I am painting. Three Pears 2016 Carolina Elena Palomino soft graphite on paper 8x6

Note how dirty my table gets. I just use my kneaded eraser directly on the table surface to clean up my mess.

Regardless, of the drawings I make before painting, it still almost impossible to quiet the voice of the dragon completely. As I paint, I try and recall the words of Ira Glass, below.

 

 

Thank you, Ira, from all of us. We need to hear that- again and again. Someday that dragon will know it's place and hang out in the corner until the painting is finished.

After sketching with my Palomino soft graphite pencil, I turned to my pastels. I like to work on a painting, from start to finish, in one sitting. It just works best that way for me. Below, you will see how I start. Since my drawing skills are sketchy (pardon the pun. I couldn't resist,) I tend to use my pastels, not as drawing tools so much, but rather like sculpting tools. I tend to work out the shapes as I go along. I work one plane, then another... stand back, adjust, stand back, adjust again, and I repeat this, over and over again, until the shape starts to emerge. I am sure there is a better way, but without lessons, this is what I found works best.

 

Here is the final painting:

Three Pears On A Tray, Carolina Elena 2016 16x20

Pears On A Tray, by Carolina Elena

pastel on sanded board 16 x 20"

Until next time,

Carolina Elena


Stuff Just Has To Get Done

Lara Disposing The Grass Clippings 2016 Carolina Elena pastel on paper 9X10

Lara Disposing The Grass Clippings, pastel on sanded paper, 9x10"

It is so totally true... stuff just has to get done. My landlord, and friend, Lara, works hard. She puts her hours into her regular job, her family, and also mows my lawn- and that of several other people. I am sure there are other things she wants to do, but where to find the hours in a day to get to those things?

I have been away working on another task - an all consuming one at that. I want, more than anything, to be able to get better at painting. In order to do so, I must paint every day. The days get consumed, though, by must-do tasks. I can't always stop and just paint. I take photos of everything that catches my eye. Taking the photos keeps my eyes on the lookout, and the concept of composition in an ongoing conversation with myself, but it is not enough. When I get back to my actual paints and brushes, the materials seems foreign to me - even if I have only been away a week or so. This stuff, this not being able to paint everyday, gets downright depressing.

It is a viscous cycle of taking care of daily living, not getting to paint, feeling guilty about it, feeling like a total poser in the art world, feeling worthless from the lack of progress, and then finally pushing everything aside only to feel completely inept with the materials at hand. It makes me want to toss all my art supplies in a bin and search for what else I may be better at. Then stagnation sets in. Before you know it, I burst and actually make some art. It feels euphoric...but it does not last, again I am called to duty before I can attempt another go at it with my materials.

Stuff just has to get done.

In an effort to massage that viscous cycle and coerce it into a more fruitful direction, I have added simple sketching with a pencil to my day. It requires no effort to carry, to set up, or to clean up. It keeps my eye talking to my brain, my brain talking to my hand.

IMG_9113

In the permanently unfinished image above, you see a sketch of a sofa I spent a few minutes on. There is no need for me to finish it as the purpose was for my eyes, brain, and hand to simply have a bit of a chat. My soft graphite Palomino pencil is new to me. It is a dream tool to work with. A bit costly for a "lowly pencil," but working with it is a dream. I like the sound it makes as I scratch the surface of the paper. It makes a good dark... something I need to push myself to to not lose in my drawings. 

I made another quick sketch, one when my day had left me spent. I was too tired to set up my paints.

IMG_9115

 

It it is not great, but it did the trick of getting rid of the guilt of not painting. The image is of where I was staying while working on project that was at the top of my stuff-that-has-to-get-done list. In retrospect, I realize that MAKE ART needs to be written at the top of that list. Sketching is one way that I can do that.